Calming the Whirlwind

OK.. at the risk of sounding really old... and also negating my promise to never sound like my parents... I'm about to make a profound statement.

I can't believe Christmas is next week! It has come out of nowhere it seems.

I know literally it has not. The 25th is the 25th every year... right after the 24th and right before the 26th. Yet, as I get older, it seems that the whirlwind of life gets faster and faster. It started on Thanksgiving when our baby was hospitalized with respiratory problems. That took 3 days out of our season and seemed to put us "off of schedule." As a family, we've been rushing from event to event since, preparing cards, presents, etc... no different than most families at this time of year I suppose.

Yet, I'm seeking forgiveness right now... I have rushed through the season getting from event to event without regard for THE event. We've not purposefully created space in our life to reflect on the miracle of the season. We've not proactively educated our children on the miracle of the Messiah's birth. We've only been showing the kids that Christmas is a busy season.. and not a Birth Season.

That is until an event late last week caused me to stop in my tracks and take note. In the middle of my preparations and chaos I was offered a new opportunity at my workplace to take responsibility for a different team of individuals with a completely separate set of responsibilities from what I've been doing for the last 4 years. The kicker was I had about 24 hours to make the decision. In all honesty, I didn't realize how bored I'd become with my current role. I loved working for my boss - who is a great mentor and friend. I loved the people I worked with... I loved the work I had done... There was (and is) a lot of my current role that I'm not ready to leave behind.

Yet, the propect of something new awakened something in me. I realized how scary something new was. But yet in the scariness, something came alive in me again. I realized I would have to depend on God again to help me manage the ambiguity of the new position and I would have to create space to listen to Him again. Even as I type this, I recognize how arrogant it sounds... but you see the truth of the matter was that I had become dependent on myself in my old role. I had realized I could do it and I was relying on the talent God had given me and not upon God. I was growing but only in the areas I wanted to grow in... and not where God was pushing me.

So I have accepted the new responsibilties which will ultimately go in effect in January and I feel totaly inadequate but yet totally at peace with this decision. You see this is where the two parts of this blog post come together....

We can go through Christmas preparing for the event... and yet miss the EVENT. The whirlwind of life is profound and we all can fall prey to its suction. AND we can go through life and miss LIFE itself. Life was not meant to be lived in comfort... for in comfort we find only ourselves. The Miracle of Christmas is that "unto us a Savior is born." And not only at Christmas do we need to take time to marvel at the manger... but daily we need to realize our dependence on the Babe to help us really experience life.

So for this week, my actions have been to stop preparing to celebrate... and truly celebrate. Because God has opened my eyes up - AGAIN -to my dependence on Him... and that is the most peaceful place I can hope to be... even if there is a whirwind around me.