May 26 - Day 2

Wow, this is going to take a little while to get into the routine. I attempted to read today's reading all in one sitting early in the morning. I find my mind wandering and I'm reading and re-reading the same words. Yet when I concentrate I discover You're still there ... You never move... You always show up to meet with me.

Today I identify with Lot's wife. (Gen 19) As she left her home as it was burning and sulphur was raining down she looked back and became a pillar of salt. How often do I look back on the stench I've left behind when I know God is calling me to a new purer life. The life that is behind me is safe and comfortable - though it is eroding and dying. But the life that is ahead of me is unknown and scary. I know it is best to follow God.... I just don't want to leave my safety and my stench.

I also am refreshed by reading the passage of Hagar and Ishmael. (Gen 16) It helps me realize how You continue to speak to us daily -- if we listen. This was the passage that helped Nicole and I make our decision to pursue Embryo Adoption for our family. We were reminded that Abraham and Sarah thought they were doing a very good thing by becoming parents of Ishmael and inviting Hagar into their plan. Your plan for Abraham was to wait. Yet you allowed them to pursue their self-will and as a result Ishamel and the rest of his lineage have been in conflict with your people since.

This passage hit us at a time in our life when we were trying to expand our family. We were going to pursue domestic infant adoption for a second time. It was safe, it was comfortable and we knew how to do it all over again. Yet, you were calling us to the unknown. You were telling us that comfort is not the same as peace. You were granting us peace, but we would have to rest in you for the comfort to make it through a process we knew very little about. Thank You dear Father for making your word relevant to our lives even today!

I was also refreshed today by reading about Isaac and Rebekah (Gen 24). When Isaac's servant went back to Abraham's homeland to find Isaac a wife he prayed a specific expectant prayer. He prayed for a girl who would come to offer him a drink and also water his camels. When such a girl came he would know this was who was to become Isaac's wife. It caused me to ask, how often do I pray such specific and expectant prayers. Sure, I pray for healing or for help. But do I really get this specific and pray for the details only I know you can provide. OR when I do pray this specifically, how often do I chalk it up to coincidence rather than your ordained events? Forgive me Father for limiting your ability to work miracles in my life. Help me develop my prayers into arrows that pierce the darkness and allow you to reveal yourself in mighty ways.

Thank You again for meeting with me today. I love you Dear Father and can't wait to record what else it is You will reveal to me in this study. Help me protect the time to meet with you and give me unfathomable concentration as I digest your Word.